The morning started out like every other morning, nothing different… the same ole blues, moaning about being tired and oh me another day. Quickly, well for me it was quickly, I put on my clothes and headed up stairs for the only good thing about a day, coffee. I filled my cup, sat in my chair and did what I do every day, glared out the window at another ugly day.
The above paragraph used to be my life but something changed. Depression had me wrapped up in a dark world of nothingness for many years. Today I am free. Today, and just for this day I don’t live in the dark world of depression. For years the, good ole doctors experiment with different drugs, different treatments, hospitalization after hospitalization but nothing seem to provide a lasting cure for my deep feelings of sadness and hatred of life.
I remember thinking God didn’t love me or even have time to listen to me. I did believe He existed but I believed He didn’t have much to do with those exiled to earth. I tried God on many occasion but that didn’t seem to help. What was I to do? I hate life and I had tried suicide more than once and that didn’t even work so what was I to do.
The solution wasn’t more medication or adding a different pills to the existing pills I was taking. Neither was it more group therapy, or reading positive affirmations every morning… though all this helped it wasn’t the answer.
Today, I started my morning the same way. I started my morning in the days of my deepest depression. I quickly put on my clothes moaned, yes I still moan about being tired. I headed up stairs for my cup of coffee, sat down in the same chair and stared out the same window but this time I saw the green leaves on the beautiful trees. Wow, what a difference; for three years, for the most part, I have been depression free. Now, that doesn’t mean I don’t have my moments where the blues creep in but it is so different. I am free from all the medicine I used to take and I even exercise a bit. I work all day long and I am happy, for the most part.
Depression free is simply but it takes work. If it wasn’t simply I wouldn’t be free. If it didn’t take work on my part I would not be free. For me the combination of faith and work has been the simple solution.
I am going to list a few things I do on a daily basis that worked for me today. First, I pray when I sit down in my chair. I have developed a real faith in God’s power to set me free. I also make the decision to see the green in the trees and focus only on the good not the bad. I don’t devaluate anything, especially myself. I am a nice person and a good person. Depression in most cases, at least for me, came from three unhealthy thoughts or ideas. One, I was a bad person. Oh no, I am a good person. I might do a few bad things now and then but my heart has been changed by the power of a living God. Next, I don’t look at the future in a negative light. Depression says, “The future is hopeless.” No it isn’t. God has my future in His hands and I trust Him to do the right thing. Another thing or thought I had to change was about this day. I used to tell myself that today was horrible and it would never change. Wrong, this is a great day and I will live it to the fullest.
In reviewing my part in living a relatively depression free life I have to include a little exercise, no alcohol and the willingness to keep getting up in the morning and changing my thoughts. I also would include putting on my clothes, sitting in my chair, drinking my coffee, and looking out the window with the hope of; the hope…let me repeat that word, the hope of living one more day depression free. In addition, I must conclude that I owe my freedom to direct intervention from God. I know that sounds too simply but it is working and I pray it continues to work. I don’t care to live in the dark world and I don’t have to.
If you are suffering from depression, I hope you find the way out. You must never give up and believe me, suicide is never the answer. If you feel like you want to hurt yourself or anyone else, dial 911 and ask for help or call your doctor. I had to do that many times and it kept me from doing what I really didn’t want to do, die depressed.
Dr Bob Wilkerson is author of the book, “I Will Not Be Defeated Anymore”. He is dedicated to helping others recover from life altering circumstances. Dr. Bob is a motivational speaker/singer with a true life story of God’s power to change any individuals life. If you would like more information go to http://www.freewebs.com/bobwilkerson